T-Two

I just visited a ghost-gold-mining-town where men cut off their thumbs to afford for their daughters to marry and then couldn’t mine the gold so that we can do it in style. Blood-diamonds-bloody-gold. And thirteen million tons of useless rock heaped on the fields so now nothing will grow there, rock that will put holes in your lungs and the doctors say to drink up and keep working. Hail Brittania, who tore up the country-side in search of shiny things and tore up the people and taught them to speak english. The widows-of-the-mine have to pay for water that comes in a tank on a truck every few days will Jesus painted and chipping on the back of it (and a church every two miles, yes that was Bethany Lutheran Church where are we anyways?) all the water they need for cooking for drinking is holy water.
and then I climbed a mountain this morning and I watched the sunrise like a blood-orange and then met a girl who raped-by-her-cousin-with-a-child-no-family-will-touch-her and she tried not to cry when she said that no one blames him not a speck. They hide him away somewhere and say it was some shepherd from a lower caste but he never touched her and all she wants is for her daughter to know who her father is. Then girls at a convent school learning to be office assistants who give me a bindi and kiss my cheeks and say “oh, so pretty!” and dance about their mothers beaten by drunken fathers and say their dreams: to live a good life in fear of God, to care for my mother-and-father-in-law, to go to the U.S. I can't stop smiling because they smile so big, like suns. Sister Stella is teaching them self-confidence. They ask us to pray for them.

We have a saying here: T-two. In roman numberals: TII. This Is India.

In India we shower in buckets. There is never toilet paper. On the street you can buy a coconut and a man will hack off the top with a machete and stick in a straw. I wear a scarf every day: a dupatta. The word for hello means “I see God in you.” “Namaskara.” The trucks are painted bright colors. Today I saw one that said “We Two, Ours One”. What does that mean? The women wear strings of flowers in their hair every day and saris in colors I didn't think existed. The men wear checkered dhotis, like a towel around th e waist. There are more motorcycles than cars. Cheese is nearly non-existent, but homemade yogurt is at every meal. Eat with your right hand, wipe with your left. I speak “swelpa swelpa Kannada” and no Tamil, Urdu, Hindi, Malyalam, Telagu... but I can hear them all on the street, or could if I could tell them apart. There are dogs everywhere, and cows. In some places, pigs or goats or cats. And everywhere trash lining the sides of the road. There are mountains that are piles of impossible gray rocks and long grass. There are temples on top of them. There are not clothes-dryers. You see women washing clothes violently in the same slow river where one man washes his motorcycle another his cow. We rode for an our on top of a bus, like Indians do. The kids try out their english “Which country? Your name is?” “America, U.S. Nanna hessaru Bay-ta-ny. Ninna hessaru yenu?” “oh, chenna-gee-day!” I can't write the loopy blunt alphabet. My favorite word: Sundara, beautiful. I say this when the girls smile, when someone hands me a baby, when I see the mountains, but I don't know how to express in any language what it is to hear the story of a woman who is holding her child and they are both crying.

This Is India.